The Devil's Trill

Below is a copy/paste of a post I made at Patreon (with some minor tweaks to fit this site etc)–

Incoming comic-related, kinda mopey post with some bad news. Sorry for the drama but I feel the need to explain. 🙁

I was really, really doing my best to avoid this, but I’ve been feeling serious lack of inspiration with my comic The Devil’s Trill in particular lately. But I finally acknowledged it yesterday when I was about to start work on the next comic page for it and that…feeling…is still freakin’ there. The fact that I’m getting to some stuff that should make me super excited was my sign. It’s just not going away.

When I first began Devil’s Trill, I was absolutely obsessed, which for me, once I’m solidly obsessed with a story idea for some time, usually means I am in it for the long haul, it’s glued to my brain now, and for years, that was true. Even when I began Knell alongside of it, I was still crazy about it and having another story on the side that I was also crazy about just helped my motivation rather than hurt it, but then something the last year or two just…deflated.

I keep thinking it’s some sort of story issue. When looking at the direction it goes, something is not clicking for me anymore. At first I thought I was just suffering some temporary, partial burnout (and honestly that could still be true), so I tried to power through it and felt hopeful when I had moments of inspiration come bursting back, but when I’m getting to some REALLY GOOD parts in the story and STILL keep feeling like it’s homework, I know something is terribly wrong.

So what does this mean?

Yep, I’m thinking I’m going to put Devil’s Trill on the back burner for a while and see if I can sort out it’s story issues with less immediate pressure while I continue to update Knell (which will be updated more as a result, aside from the break weeks). I guess it’s possible I may have a sudden change of heart but I’d say I’m probably going to do this.

I absolutely HATE this, partially because I know at least a good chunk of people following me are mainly following for Devil’s Trill, and also partly because there’s a lot I still love about the story and characters, in spite of my lack of inspiration, so I’m like “Sarah what the hell?? This is pretty good! And Florian’s so twisted and fun! DO IT FOR FLORIAN DAMMIT”

I also hate this because I feel like I’m back to letting too many projects sit in back burner land again, something I did a lot in my younger, “still learning” comic artist era, when I felt like I had fully gotten past all that when I finished Daniel. I feel this worry that no one’s going to stick around for my work with the fear that a comic they got into will be put on hiatus. I feel like I’m constantly giving into my fickle brain rather than dedicating myself like I should. < / Okay, worst of the self-pitying rant over. Sorry about that. XP >

Now Knell I’m still very much into and having fun with, so again, that will continue like normal, but even with that I’ve been dealing with some story issues. Now it’s not NEAR as severe as the issues I’m having with Devil’s Trill, but having that going on top of things is just adding to the stress and making me go, “What’s wrong with me?” Maybe I’m just aiming too big with everything and putting too much on my shoulders.

All I know is, I don’t want to continue with Devil’s Trill yet if I’m not feeling right about the story, if I’m only feeling down while I’m working on it. My half-hearted stuff never turns out right to me, and I don’t want to push something I’m not proud of. The concept/setting are still something I’ve wanted to work with for a long time, and I can’t see my obsession with dark romance staying away from me forever, that stuff is like ingrained in my BLOOD, so I’m really hoping I just need to set it aside and give myself a break from juggling two comics for a bit.

I’m sorry to those who were following me for Devil’s Trill and not Knell, and I hope my patrons stick around for my other work in spite of this as your support really helps me a LOT, but if some of you are feeling like you’re not getting what you paid for at the moment, I understand.

Now Knell may have more cute family stuff in it but TRUST ME when I say you will ABSOLUTELY get your fix of disturbing macabre stuff in there if that’s what you’re craving from me. I DO 100% PROMISE YOU THAT. It’s still VERY much a dark story. I think I don’t have it in me to make a happy one. XD Now romance? Ehh, not so much. Some, maybe, but Knell is definitely more family relationship-centered.

Once again, I’m so sorry to those who were looking forward to more Devil’s Trill in the immediate future. I really hope some powerful inspiration hammers me in the head soon, like…this October would be nice so I can immediately get back to normal. XP

As for updates, I’m leaning towards updating Knell this week, but because I made this sudden decision with Devil’s Trill I’ve gotten a very slow start on the page. I’m going to do my best, but if not, I may drop the idea and work on something small instead and get back to regular updating of that comic next week.

READ MY STILL-UPDATED WEBCOMIC KNELL AT VERMILLIONWORKS AND COMICFURY

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